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Real Housewives of Berks County

I am a real housewife of Berks County.  Getting my nails done means doing the dishes by hand to get the grit left behind by the flower beds I just weeded. My hair gets cut when the mirror in the bathroom is clean enough to see my reflection as I snip away with dull scissors and the best workout I can think of includes the push mower and about 3 acres of land.

Bravo has an amazing success in its Real Housewives (of anywhere) and don't get me wrong these ladies are a hoot to watch.  But somewhere in the back of my mind I am convinced their antics have to be "put on", as we like to say in Pa Dutch country.

No way do real women, housewives or those that work outside the home, take so much precious time to fight about so many insignificant issues.

And for goodness sakes who has the time to gossip about what Mrs. So and So wore to a Black-tie affair.  What exactly does black-tie mean to a woman?

Who has the time to shop for hours for purses that are placed on shelves for art?  If I have art, am I going to leave it at eye level with a two-year-old?

Now we have housewives raving about strategic bullying, because one can't speak overtop of the others all the time, and another who spends more on her wigs a month than I spent on my quarterly grocery bill.

Note to Bravo producers, I've got a pretty good set of lungs and can sing like a pro without studio tweaking, overdubbing and high-end tuning.  And while my two books aren't hitting the top 10 like the ones written by these diverse divas, they are solid books with meat and potato filling rather than the fluff and stuff being touted by notorious ex-strippers.

But, I'll continue to watch... because I can't help myself. I am fascinated by these spoiled, insecure, self-centered matrons of similar-minded children and hope someday Bravo comes to my house to do a couple of hours of footage. I'm saving the basement spring cleaning until they do and so my husband is just going to have to be content with that!